There's a reason I only go to parties in NYC DJ-ed by white boy Max (yeah, I know, he's white), because he's the only DJ that plays as if we were all on Hellshire Beach, in swimwear, frass! Big up Portmore!
Every individual on this earth must participate in at least one bacchanal (carnival). The experience is invigorating. Check out the "Carnivals" tab as I aim to accomplish my dream of participating in every worldly carnival before time's up.
¿Tú entiendes español? ¡Buena! Amo el baile "Flamenco. Me gustaría para alguien enseñarme cómo hacer este baile. Amo las culturas de muchas diferentes países y religiones, incluyendo España, Muslim y más. Lean "Inside Culture" para más.
It is amazing how history can still capture your attention, even if it occurred over 50 years ago. Any "Inside History" post will take you to my favorite topics of the past.
Laughter is the cure to everything. The Office gives life. Musicals, gangster movies + more are types of films that I love. Check out "Inside Film" for more.
I've grown up as a familial person and eventually assimilated myself into a small circle of friends. Quality time with my closest people is something very important to me. Check out any "Inside Holidays" for my most valuable leisures.
I'm not the biggest fashion head but I do enjoy a few events. Mercedes Benz Fashion Week is a very important week in the fashion world. I've enjoyed plenty of other events also. Check out "Inside Fashion" for the deets.
Las Vegas has been one of my most life-changing experiences in regards to nightlife. Check out any "Inside Adventures" or "Inside Nightlife" post to uncover other compelling trips, parties and events.
Learning makes me feel worthy. Education is very important to me and I think it is truly the only thing that can save humanity. Check out any "Inside Education" post for my input.
Music has had one of the biggest influences on my life. It became a big part of my childhood with my father in the Reggae business. Check out any "Inside Music" post for my taste.
I have extreme pride in my city because of our sports legacy in America. Check out any "Inside Sports" for details as well as experiences outside of Boston!
There is always something to do in the city of no-sleep. Life proves to be a party without actually going to a party. Join me in the journeys in any "Inside Adventures" posts.
There are awesome people out there that either are on the rise to fame or don't want it at all. I've discovered that I have favorites falling under both conditions. Check out any "Inside People" post to learn about them.
FOOD! Need I say more? Check out just SOME of my Boston, NYC, and Miami recommendations in any "Inside Restaurants" post.
It wouldn't be out of the ordinary to see my girls or buddies and I partying with celebrities, many of whom are friends. Olympic gold medalists Usain Bolt and Asafa Powell aren't the only ones that knew how to get down with the crew! Check out any "Inside Adventures" or "Inside Nightlife" post.
Love to travel and party? We have something in common! After reading a few posts on this blog, you'll be ready to pack your vacation bag with me!
"In the Time of the Butterflies' is a remarkable movie that shares the true story of 3 girls from La República Dominicana fighting against their country's dictator. Political topics often arise from gratuitous arguments. "Check out any "Inside Politics" post for debates.
There are perks being a city-girl. Too many. Check out any "Inside Shows" to see which daytime, late-night, or cultural show I've got to be in the audience for.
If you browsed through this blog and couldn't pinpoint my love for art, I hope this is enough. Suheir Hammad (above) is one of my favorite Spoken Word figures. Check out any "Inside Spoken Word" post for more.
If you are successful and feel productive in life, you should celebrate, relax. You just don't do one and forget about the other. They go hand n hand. On posts, I share experiences and favorite spots.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Inside Music: The Exclusive Dancehall Track Used At Rihanna's 24th Birthday Bash -- Max Glazer, Popcaan, And More!
There's a reason I only go to parties in NYC DJ-ed by white boy Max (yeah, I know, he's white), because he's the only DJ that plays as if we were all on Hellshire Beach, in swimwear, frass! Big up Portmore!
I don't know if there is a cure or a remedy to make a man not cheat. I doubt that even exists. The only real law regarding cheating is listed in The Ten Commandments, but who reads The Bible anymore? Obviously not enough people. And still, there are those who read The Bible and are well familiar with The Ten Commandments, yet still proceed to commit in adulterous acts. I'm looking for a real remedy, a real cure. I'm talking the kind of cure that saves a brain cancer patient, an HIV/Aids patient. I'm looking, I'm looking...
There is none.
But like so many of these sicknesses that takes our loved ones away from us, or causes unbearable pain upon them, cheating can be compared. Cheating, just like so many other diseases, even has the ability to kill people. Men kill guys over sleeping with their woman, and vice versa, every, single, day.
Sorry girls, there isn't a real cure for your spouse to stop cheating. And I apologize if you thought the title of this blog led you to think so. But there is a way for you to prevent that from happening. A certain way that is so promising, you won't blame yourself for cheating if he ever decided to. You'd be content enough with just walking away.
LET YOUR MAN KNOW WHAT IT IS.
Let me tell you something about my love. If you agree that God has destined you to be with somebody already, even though you haven't met him, then we're on the same page. My love is so real, that even when I'm talking to a guy where we both know we weren't made to be with each other, he still questions that notion and wants to believe that I AM his perfect match because I give my love to him in every way, the loving way, the honest way, doggy style, I could go on. THAT'S how real my love is. That's how powerful love can be.
No, I do not believe I have met the person I was destined to be with, because I haven't felt it. It's something that you instantly feel and know. I won't put it pass myself because maybe I have been, or am, oblivious to past/current relationships that had potential, but only time will tell. Regardless, I have learned how to give my all because of all of the experiences I have had in past relationships. Each relationship I came out of, each relationship that I know of , I learned from. I take mental notes and learn what to do, and especially what not to do.
You should learn from your surroundings. Learn from the relationships you've had. Learn from the ups and the downs your parents have had, or your friends have had. I don't know about you all, but I have learned a lot from my friends' relationships so much. Not only will you learn the kind of woman you should be, but you'll also learn of the type of men that you do NOT want. You will learn how to set your standards and to always set them HIGH. You will learn the lines a man isn't allowed to cross. The failure of relationships you get to witness can teach you a lot because if you know enough about a friend's relationships, you'll learn what your girl did right, and what your girl did wrong. It's the same thing for guys.
You want to show your man that you are more than a housewife. Look at the housewives that were so popular for centuries. They cook, clean, and put on a beautiful show of their home and their appearance to make their life look golden. However, their husbands got tired of that eventually. So there you have it, a man has his housewife to keep his belly full, look, after his children, and to keep his house clean. But where is the woman to make love to him? Where is the woman to be there for him when he's down? Where is the woman that can help the family and her husband out financially whenever work is going slow? That's when he decides to sleep out and get what he's not getting at home, and you don't know where he's at, at night. That's when he tells you he wants a divorce because he fell in love with his co-worker that exhibited intelligence. And you never saw it coming...
There is NO reason why your man should cheat on you if you are being your all, while giving him your all.
Being Your All
-Having the initiative to go to school
-Having the initiative to have a career
-Working out, staying healthy, keeping fit
-Showing the world, and most importantly yourself, that you can be happy all by yourself
I'm sure you can add to this list.
Giving Your All
-Always exhibiting your intelligence (he needs to be reminded that he's married to a smart ass)
-Being there for him when he's down (men do have hearts)
-Weekend getaway vacations
-Always keeping fit & sexy, so sexy that his friends want a piece
-Developing interest in the things he likea
-Paying the bills sometimes
-Knowing how to cook, so when he doesn't feel like it, you can (for all of my ladies that are against being solely housewives)
I'm sure your partner can add to this list.
You want to be a challenge for your man. Something that he will always want to have. First of all, if you're being your ALL, then that is enough to attract him. Giving your all, that's just a plus. When you all are at an event, you better make sure that your hair is the flyest, and your dress, your shoes? On point. When he comes home from work, have dinner ready with a glass of wine. If some nights you don't feel like cooking after knowing you will be tired when you get home from work, do something quirky. Call him at work and tell him to meet you at a restaurant you've never been to before. If you live in a city like NYC, take advantage of the thousands of restaurants they have here. NEVER eat at the same restaurant twice. If ever you get a day off that he doesn't have off, surprise him when he comes home. Set the bubble bath, put candles around the room, buy some sexy lingerie and utilize your beauty. Use it to entice him and make him happy when he gets home. You never know, maybe he was having a bad day at work and needed just that. Do very special things that aren't worth a dime. Write a poem for him, and perform it for him. IT might give him a smile you never saw coming, and those are the things, the personal things, that make us much more happier than expensive gifts. Quality over quantity, I always say, especially if you don't have any money to buy lavish gifts. There are so many ideas that you can think of. Use your imagination. There is no limit to how far your mind can stretch, there's plenty of room for ideas!
As an independent, strong, beautiful woman that gives her man everything and does everything for him personally, financially, sexually, that is enough of a reason for him not to cheat. Please do not be selfish when it coms to your appearance. You should look good. Not everyone has to have the supermodel body, or a video vixen's shape, but you can take care of yourself. First of all, you should be in shape for yourself regardless, not for any man or person, but for yourself. That shouldn't even be a concern when you're in a relationship because it should always be sought after on your own. There is a limit on weight. In case you didn't know, exceeding the average weight limit for your height, or losing too much weight is not good for your health. Amongst other sicknesses, you can obtain diabetes or anorexia, respectively. Your appearance matters to your man. He wants to come home to an intelligent, sexy wife; his own video vixen.
You want to be the nerd so your man can look to for answers, seeing that you graduated from college and are pursuing a worthy career too. You want to be the chef that cooks just as good as a real one, so he doesn't have to do take-out. You want to be the boss that keeps him in check, so he doesn't need any other hater telling him of his faults. You want to be the whore that likes to sleep with other women's husbands so he doesn't have to go to a corner. You want to be his travel buddy, so he doesn't have to call his boys to go to Vegas because he'll know he would enjoy it more with you. You want to be his partner-in-crime so when he wants to go to a party, you're right there with him wining, daggerring, wilding out, whatever it is you do. You want to be the cleaning lady you two don't have to hire, because your cleaning skills are that good. You want to be his stylist so when you all are going out, he can ask you if what he's wearing looks good. He trusts your decision so well because you, yourself, know how to dress. You want to be the friend he can call on for advice, because he's that comfortable with you. You want to be his best friend.
I'm not sure if what I'm saying is right, I'm only attesting for myself and the results off of the advice I have given off to friends. All of the aforementioned should prevent your man from cheating. All of the aforementioned, is the cure. We, ladies, are all different. So maybe you have another way of keeping your man into you, and only into you. I do know that being happy and being the best woman that you can be is enough. There are posts that I wrote at the bottom that are similar to this post, and tells you more on how to be the best woman that you can be.
If this is not enough to keep your man from cheating, then let him go, because he doesn't deserve you. I have listed things in this post that truly exhibits a golden woman, a trophy wife, an angel, and all of the above. If you are really putting your all into being the best woman that you can be, as WELL as making him happy, and he still cheats? It's not worth it. You will surely know that if you truly are that type of strong woman. You will have the courage to walk away. I have found that all of the aforementioned has worked, and it forever leaves an impact on who has had the privilege to experience such good love. Trust me, they don't want you to go.
I think at the end of it all, it's really you being a great woman, and all that it encompasses, that is the cure for your man not to cheat. What he meets for the first time and falls in love with, is what he wants for the rest of his life, and that was the woman that you worked so hard on becoming. Remain that woman, but throughout the relationship always throw in new things, like a new hairstyle, or traveling to a new place, teaching him something new in the bedroom, whatever it may be, do it. Keep your relationship alive, and treat it like you did when it was brand new.
Don't be a woman of his dreams, be THE woman of his dreams so that when he is sleeping next to you, dreaming, he finds more pleasure in waking up to see you sleep beautifully next to him, rather than dream about a woman that can no where measure up to your heights. Now that's power. That's love.
I was one of these kids. I was extremely bright as a child, always getting Principal's and Perfect Attendance Awards, but I started to get bored in my mid-teenage years. I wanted more, because that straight A's life wasn't enough, and I knew I could conquer more. In Middle School, I went into cheerleading, eventually became the captain. Then I went into football, became a captain for the women's team. Then I went into track, scored 2nd place placements for my team all the time. I wanted to excel, and knew I could so I went for the shot. I liked the challenge and the adventure. It's remarkable how you understand yourself and your progression in life. I am the same way I once was, except I am now an adult. Sooner than later, my interests went into the party scene. I was always into dance and knew that I could take my moves to the party scene and be locally known. That I did. Eventually, I didn't even go to parties to dance anymore, I just went there because I knew my presence was felt and I had easy access to any VIP area, hung out with the hippest. That was me at 15, 16-years old up in a 21+ club somewhere in Boston hanging with 25, 26-year olds.
Now all of that might sound fun, exciting, and it was, because people knew who I was because of my talents, but intelligence can be a hell of a thing. I was too smart for my age, and I always wanted more. All of those nights sneaking out of the house to go party were memorable, but they were unnecessary. It was all because I wanted more. Parents, though this isn't something too terrible, it can be worse. Your children can turn to drugs, or could eventually go into anything just to get attention. Your girl child can become a video whore because she always wants the spotlight, or subject herself to prostitution because money and male attention feels good. Your boy child can run into selling drugs or engage into other criminal activities just to keep his image up.
These things that I think, during the times that I think them, always are unexpected.
I never know how or when these ideas or reasonings come about in my head, but they do, and I try to make sense out of it.
I noted something. How African-American entertainers transfigure into elite entertainers crossed my mind. Take a look at Rap artists turned actors. I'll use Ice Cube and Ice-T as examples. We remember Ice Cube and Ice-T as hardcore rappers, straight out the hood. Take Ice Cube in all of the Friday movies as examples. Would we ever imagine him to be the young, handsome, well-put-together man he is today? He has gotten to a point where he directs his own movies, forget acting. And for Ice-T, look at the difference between him being the hardcore rapper that he was, and now, the well-equipped detective on Law & Order.
Now let's take a look at two power couples: Beyonce & Jay Z and Jada Pinkett Smith & Will. These musicians/actors went from just having a predominantly African-American audience, to years later, having a diverse audience. Jay-Z's raps 10 years ago are clearly different from what they are today. Back then, he was more hardcore, and it was directed more towards African-Americans. His raps have become more "safer" over time because of his exposure and business relations with other races. The more you come into the limelight of the white actors, musicians, and etc., the more you are forced to change your image because you are slowly entering into a whole new world. The same thing is happening to Nicki Minaj, which is why, I believe, her raps have become softer, and not as good as they were in her prime. Take a look at B. Her music is as good today as it was back then but we see a transgression in her style. Though her music was always "pro-women", her music crowd has expanded to all races, far more than it was before. Jada Pinkett-Smith went from the bad ass hood girl in Set It Off, to wining and dining with the Cruises. Will went from the funny, straight out of Philly dude on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air to making Oscar worthy movies like I Am Legend, Hancock, The Pursuit of Happyness, and Seven Pounds. I felt like Men In Black was the breaking point for him, the point where he entered a whole new world.
Now I don't have to be right about this, but I simply believe the more exposure many African-American entertainers get from diverse crowds, the more their images are changed and they become more elite than they were before. Beyonce and Jada now grace the same carpets as Angelina and Jennifer Anniston, etc, looking just as good. When you start to see that not only African-Americans are fans of you, but other races too, producers and directors of other races want to work with you too. I love Beyonce's, Jay-Z's, Jada's, and Will's images today better than before. Of course, Jay still throws on a hoodie and his baggy jeans. There's nothing wrong with that at all. But him, including so many, found class. They have not tried to be anything else but African-American, but they, and other African-American entertainers have shown the world that we can be just as mannerable, tasteful, and classy as other entertainers.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Wave LG: Love that piece about technology taking over the world. Appreciate your thought process, but technology in itself has major shortcomings that nature doesn't, and sooner or later it's back to basics. There is always a standard deviation where science and technology is concerned, but with nature all things are possible (including technology itself, if you know what I mean)
I do strongly agree that our increasing reliance on technology diminish our skill sets, and natural talents as a people. Every process is becoming more and more automated, causing us to think less. Pretty soon we will forget how to add without a calculator and so forth, but there will come a time when we will be forced to do it again- Technology will fail, nature will prevail.
Keep that brain working, a mind is a terrible thing to waste. Big up yuhself!
~Thanks a lot Wave! Your words were nicely put and I completely agree.
Candace: I related to this post and I'm happy to see other young women valuing their life, setting and accomplishing goals. Thank you so much for sharing this post with me. We as women need to support and inspire one another and I am so truly inspired by you. You are a young women who already knows exactly where she's going. You have a clear vision of your future and that alone has and will take you to great places. I love to see the things you are doing to be a better you. "Life should be lived; not controlled," and you are living proof of that. I remember when you first reached out to me on MySpace and the first official time we met. I must say, I am so proud of how far you've come. Your father was right, you are definitely on the right track.
"I'm the designated driver of my own life, so if I crash, no one else will be responsible but me." I don't even have to tell you how much I love that quote. The last paragraph is something EVERYONE should read. You're doing it Bianca!! Keep believing in yourself and your dreams. God Bless!
Nasheema: B, you're such a selfless, ambitious, goal-drieven, wonderful woman. I have only know you for nearly two years and it is clear that your parents gave you enough resources and freedom to blossom into one of the world's most influential women (whether Forbes lists you or not lol). From the diverse education they blessed you with, to the life lessons you obviously had to learn from them, you are definitely equipped to roll with the big dawgs. Anyone you trust and love is lucky to have you as a friend, sister, daughter, spouse. Often times all we (young adult or driven college kids) can do is grind grind grind without taking a second to analyze whether we are being a justice to society or not and just in case no one else who cares about you has told you lately, you are certainly an asset to us. Keep turning heads and living life to its fullest, I'll be right there with you! From this soon-to-be PR practitioner to the soon-to-be bi-lingual, well-traveled lawyer, I fully endorse www.mynameisbiancastar.com! ;-)
I'm sure you are flooded with messages constantly. I know that we never really talking in highschool but your ability to always keep moving in inspiring. I really admire the strength you have, the grace you have, and the confidence you perpetually build. Glad to see people from the Class of 2009 doing big things! Good luck with everything you do in this world, you will make your mark in anything you do.
This was in response to a status I put on FB:
I never get to sit and examine my blog. I just write, post, and share. I never have time. I just took a good look through my blog and I love my life. With 181,834 views, I guess 181,834 other people do too. I just want to stress how important it is for everybody to live their life. I started to understand it for the last 3 years my father was dying, and understood it completely as I watched him die in that last hour of his life. Set your own goals and work hard to accomplish them. No one is a failure unless you choose to be. If you mess up in life or if things/people weren't in your favor to see you prosper, don't worry baby, it is never too late to get back on your feet and chase your dreams. Tell your best friend you love them. Tell your boyfriend you forgive him. Tell your mom thank you for everything. It takes a lot more energy to be mad in life, than to be happy. Don't argue. Be kind. Work hard. Party hard. Be happy. Happiness is contagious. Once someone sees you're truly happy, they will ask how and want the same. Sooner or later this world will be filled with happy people.
There are so many of us strong, beautiful, educated young women out there that knows how to appreciate one another. That's what real women do. I'm blessed to have women like these in my life.
I first met Dai when my good friend Barbie invited me to a Fashion's Night Out event that the store she styles at was hosting, Patricia Field. I didn't know of Dai as a musician then. I merely knew her as a stylist at Patricia Field also, and a friend of Barbie's. For those of you who are unaware of who Patricia Field is (the most fabulous store for you to walk into and shop at if you are seeking to look different at an event), she is a fashion icon, designer, and stylist. She has designed for Sex and the City, The Devil Wears Prada, and Ugly Betty. She has even claimed credit for the invention of the woman "legging" in the 70s. Her boutique, that is located on 302 Bowery Street by the Soho area. To the left, is a picture of her crew that works in her store, including my very good friend Barbie, and your very own, Dai Burger.
Blogger, Missy Krissy, describes Dai's style. "Dai Burger's styling may be a little outrageous for the faint of heart... However, I find it to be over the top and fabulous. It's a definite source for inspiration."
Let's talk about Dai.
As previously stated, upon me first meeting Dai I did not know of her true talents. It wasn't until me, one of my best friend's (Nancy), Barbie, and Dai met up at Lincoln Center to go see The Nutcracker, that she let us listen to a new track that she was going to come out with a few weeks from then. It was titled, "Naughty Never Nice." Instantly, we fell in love. That's when she proceeded to tell me about her website and where I could find more music. Barbie also reminded me about previously asking me to show some coverage on her, I regret not doing this sooner. Dai is a true talent that will eventually go to higher heights. She still climbs. Look out.
Dai's Facebook Fan Page
Dai's Personal Website
For those of you didn't know about Sizzla's whereabouts for the past few years, it's okay, no one did. The talented, young, Rastafarian artist disappeared from Jamaica from what went from months to a few years. The rumor was that Sizzla had fled from Jamaica to Zimbabwe due to gun and murder related charges, but he quickly denied those rumors and stated that Zimbwabe was now his home.
Though Sizzla is in Jamaica now, he actually does have his own residence in Zimbwabe. "I have received tremendous welcome," Sizzla said to The Sunday Mail. He was given a whole heap of land by the government in Chegutu, a town in Northern Zimbwabe, just southwest of Kalonji's. His real reasoning as to his relocation was to answer to the call of the great Rastafarian prophet, Marcus Garvey. Garvey advocated to the African Diaspora's return to their ancestral homelands.
Sizzla has been said to be building a a highly-equipped recording studio. He has reportedly started already. "I am also looking into areas Judgement Yard can invest in for the upliftment of Zimbabwean youths," Sizzla stated proudly. He plans to set up agro-industries for youths under his Jamaican social responsibility banner, Judgement Yard. Kalonji is also speculated to have strong interest in the clothing factory in efforts to bring jobs for hundred of children. The clothign factory would produce Rastafarian and African regalia.
The allocation of the land Sizzla was given has been controversial. Critics say it was done for political reasons, but Sizzla's lady publicist, Olimatta Taal, at the time quickly remarked on the speculation, "The allocation of the farmland does not have any relation to any political party. Instead of giving him cash (for the performances) they gave him land. Although they want to discredit and criminalise him, it is very honourable that he would take land instead of cash." The land given was for the Rastafarian community.
The most untalked about, yet known rumor, is of Kalonji receiving gold from a higher authority in Africa. There is hardly none-to-little coverage on this rumor in the media, but it is something you will hear about talked amongst the mouths of Jamaicans who know him personally.
How does that Jamaican saying go?
What you hear here, what you see here, let it stay here, when you leave here, or DON'T COME BACK!